Shopping Cart Etiquette Sparks Social Media Debate: Empowering Intuition or Fostering Responsibility?

A viral TikTok video of a mother's refusal to return her shopping cart has ignited a social media debate about the importance of shopping cart etiquette, raising concerns about safety as well as highlighting the need for a nuanced approach to social norms.

President Joe Biden's recent comments blaming grocery stores for the continued high price of groceries have sparked a separate debate on social media, shifting the focus to the behavior of consumers themselves. Amidst the economic pressures facing shoppers, a mother's unapologetic defense of not returning her shopping cart has drawn sharp critiques and sparked a broader conversation about social etiquette and the safety concerns surrounding it.

In a viral TikTok video, Dr. Leslie Dobson, a married mom of two, stated, "I’m not returning my shopping cart, and you can judge me all you want. I’m not getting my groceries into my car, getting my children into the car, and then leaving them in the car to go return the cart. So if you’re gonna give me a dirty look, f--- off."

The video garnered over 11 million views, 387,700 likes, and over 100,000 comments, with reactions ranging from support to sharp disapproval. Many commenters shared their own experiences and perspectives, while others referenced an anonymous quote that has been circulating online for years, "The shopping cart is the ultimate litmus test for whether a person is capable of self-governing. To return the shopping cart is an easy, convenient task."

One TikToker and mother offered her take on grocery cart etiquette, stating that she unloads her groceries, returns the cart with her children, and then loads them back in the car. Another user pointed out that returning carts without leaving children unattended is possible by bringing a stroller or shopping cart for their use.

Dobson responded to this particular comment, saying, "I want women to feel empowered to trust their intuition if they feel unsafe, and ignore judgment. Risk isn’t worth it and our lives are precious. I have seen lives destroyed. I hope you never do." She used the same reply to multiple comments on her video, emphasizing the importance of prioritizing safety.

In a follow-up video, Dobson addressed the millions of people who had expressed concern about her refusal to return shopping carts, stating that 265 children were abducted in parking lots in America last year, half of whom were sexually assaulted. She drew this number from a fact sheet from the organization Kids and Car Safety, although the organization does not specifically mention sexual assault, but rather that most of the time thieves don't realize a child was in the car and subsequently abandon the car or the child on the side of the road.

Dobson's number appears to be based on a misinterpretation of the report, as it refers to cars stolen with children inside, not necessarily abductions or sexual assaults in parking lots. Nevertheless, her point highlights the concerns that many parents have about child safety in public places.

It is important to note that while Dobson's concerns are valid, returning shopping carts is generally considered to be an act of social responsibility. It ensures that the carts are readily available for other shoppers and helps keep parking lots clean and safe. It also reflects a sense of civic duty and consideration for others.

However, the issue of safety, particularly for women, cannot be overlooked. It is crucial to acknowledge that women often face different safety concerns than men, and their decisions should be respected. Shopping cart etiquette should not be a rigid rule that overrides personal judgment and concern for safety.

Ultimately, the debate over shopping cart etiquette underscores the complex nature of social norms and the need for a nuanced approach. It highlights the importance of empathy, understanding, and the recognition that individual circumstances and safety concerns should be taken into consideration. While returning shopping carts is generally a positive and responsible act, it is essential to empower individuals to trust their intuition and prioritize their safety, especially when they feel vulnerable.